maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
