in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
