Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
