lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
