Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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