Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
