trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
