Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
pop tarts are not kleenex
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
