Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
whose ass print is on the piano?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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