i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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