Rock
Scissors
Fuck
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
