Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
