Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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