I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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