my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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