you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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