i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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