so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
