i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
