Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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