fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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