come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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