Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
