If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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