1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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