i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm getting married
To pizza
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
PANTIES FOUND
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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