My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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