shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
