I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
did you just send me my own nude
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
