No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Randomize
