I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
