her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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