I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize