I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
