Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
