I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
