i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Oh god it's open bar.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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