I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
