You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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