Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
