You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
