it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Drunk walkin through police station. America
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
