i think my tv is drunk
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
