That's intense
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize