I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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