oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
