Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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