KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
She even gives head with a lisp.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
