Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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