Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
